Friends are Magi (cal)
This weekend was a wonderful time in the theatre. The bigger audiences made a difference, but Thursday and Friday were great too. Both nights I had friends in the audience, and the prior weekend my folks were at the Sunday show. Three shows in a row with friends and family. My dad and stepmom are both very good and close friends, so I was doubly blessed.
I saw The Beard of Avon at the Seattle Rep several years ago with my friend Rachel. After the show I waited with her outside the business office, as she knew a several of the cast from shows she had directed or AD'd (Assistant Directed). She said that working actors, especially those from out of town rarely have people they know at shows, and are usually delighted to know they have a friend or acquaintance in the audience. At the time it was a surprising concept for me. We met and chatted with one of the actors, whom I remembered from the Intiman's production of R. Buckminster Fuller. There is a bit of a story to that, I'll probably share some other time. He really was pleased to see there was someone he know at the show.
I have now worked numerous shows in different capacities where nobody I knew came. Well, that's not true. None of my family or friends outside the fringe community I hang out with came. I discovered it doesn't bother me. I believe it is a gift when you're doing something you truly love. Being alive is all you need. Aside from the late improv shows I run lights for, which would be a brutal commute via the ferry, my folks make every show they can. They travel a lot and chill the chill months in Arizona, so they do miss quite a few. When they can come, or anyone else does show up, it is a wonderful treat.
People that know enough to be upbeat right after a show are an added blessing. I think most actors can take well-meant 'helpful' feedback on a show and honestly consider it. Depending on circumstances though, a critique right after a show will bring you down a little closer or plummeting all the way to earth in an unpleasant way, unless it is the director and they are not an ass. Even if you know the 'helpful' person is full of shit. It's a negative charge applied to all the positive energy you are feeling.
Not only did I have friends at three shows in a row, they were all positive. I am very serious about my art, and don't require friends to come see me perform and pat me on the back. Generally, I no longer feel a need for that kind of validation. In a way it gives the gift of people coming to your show and patting your back a synergistic increase in meaning. More simply said, the gift is more than the some of the parts. I resolve to let them each know how important and meaningful their gift was for me.
I saw The Beard of Avon at the Seattle Rep several years ago with my friend Rachel. After the show I waited with her outside the business office, as she knew a several of the cast from shows she had directed or AD'd (Assistant Directed). She said that working actors, especially those from out of town rarely have people they know at shows, and are usually delighted to know they have a friend or acquaintance in the audience. At the time it was a surprising concept for me. We met and chatted with one of the actors, whom I remembered from the Intiman's production of R. Buckminster Fuller. There is a bit of a story to that, I'll probably share some other time. He really was pleased to see there was someone he know at the show.
I have now worked numerous shows in different capacities where nobody I knew came. Well, that's not true. None of my family or friends outside the fringe community I hang out with came. I discovered it doesn't bother me. I believe it is a gift when you're doing something you truly love. Being alive is all you need. Aside from the late improv shows I run lights for, which would be a brutal commute via the ferry, my folks make every show they can. They travel a lot and chill the chill months in Arizona, so they do miss quite a few. When they can come, or anyone else does show up, it is a wonderful treat.
People that know enough to be upbeat right after a show are an added blessing. I think most actors can take well-meant 'helpful' feedback on a show and honestly consider it. Depending on circumstances though, a critique right after a show will bring you down a little closer or plummeting all the way to earth in an unpleasant way, unless it is the director and they are not an ass. Even if you know the 'helpful' person is full of shit. It's a negative charge applied to all the positive energy you are feeling.
Not only did I have friends at three shows in a row, they were all positive. I am very serious about my art, and don't require friends to come see me perform and pat me on the back. Generally, I no longer feel a need for that kind of validation. In a way it gives the gift of people coming to your show and patting your back a synergistic increase in meaning. More simply said, the gift is more than the some of the parts. I resolve to let them each know how important and meaningful their gift was for me.
3 Comments:
Love the title of this one. Also, the encouragement to praise actors who are just coming off a show.
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I think the same goes for directors, stage managers and crew after a show. Actors are often the worst offenders, feeling you gotta say it while it is fresh in your mind. I try to remember or write it down, so I can mention it before the next show if it still seems important. Actors usually aren't in a position to pull off the director thing without playing the ass.
I have been thinking a lot about friendship as I approach the finish of Meisner, and all the close friendships there. It seems so many of my other close friends in the artistic world are going through major life changes and adjustments.
I've learned true and deep friendships are often made very quickly in the theatre world. Then, as often as not you go your separate ways as quickly. Sometimes when you meet up again it's, "Oh, hi." More often it is "Oh my God! I am so happy to see you again! What have you been doing..." I never really know which way it will go, or what drives it. I just know it makes my life very rich.
I suspect it is the same for most artistic communities. The one film I worked on was that way.
I can't understand how I survived before, and wonder if I was. My eyes fog up thinking about it. Not about what I missed for thirty-five years, as it is truly water under the bridge. It may have been a long time, but the moment I started living fully that past became fleeting ephemeral thing, quickly receding out of sight. Rather, I am moved by what the future will bring.
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